Our due date was today.
Grief is an intricate, ever-changing, always-present thing. Sometimes it hits me like a fresh, giant wave, as if I am experiencing it for the first time…again…and it is so raw. Other times it blends in with the background. It’s still there, always, but it has become a natural part of me, woven into the tapestry of my life.
As we remember our babies, grief and joy intertwine in a beautiful, sorrowful, haunting melody. Skylar, Charlie, Jesse, Taylor, and Sam are five beautiful souls we never got to meet here on earth. And their lives have eternal value. These five little souls who were frozen in time are no longer frozen. We grieve their loss, and we rejoice that they are loved and are no longer in limbo, but are in the arms of a loving Father.
And this heavy, painful grief is exactly what we signed up for. We adopted these embryo babies knowing there was no guarantee of the babies making it to term and being born. This in no way decreases the value of adopting them and giving them the opportunity to grow, develop, and possibly be born. There is so much value in this! And there is so much value in our tears for these precious little ones. They are loved. They lived. They died. And all of that matters.
Thank you for loving them with us and for grieving with us.